Category Archives: Healthy & Strong

Supplementation Station

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I’ve always pulled back from everything labeled as ‘supplements’.

I think I associate ‘supplements’ with protein shakes, steroids, and other body-building products. A-Rod takes supplements, not me.

When I hear ‘supplements’, I think this:

Yikes.

Yikes.

But in reality, I have something of an obsession with supplementing my diet. It’s getting a little out of control.

The first step is admitting you have a problem, right?

 

It's a problem.

It’s a problem.

Yeah. That’s what I take before bed every night. Finding a pill box large enough to hold this many pills took some serious shopping around.

I can’t help myself! Have you ever read what vitamins claim to be necessary for? It’s very compelling stuff.

“Tell me,” I hear you ask “why Magnesium?”

Oh, let me tell you:

‘Magnesium is an essential mineral and plays an important role in energy metabolism, protein synthesis, neuromuscular transmission and bone structure.’

Holy crap! How have I held myself together without magnesium?? Better be sure to get a healthy dose every day!

And have you heard about electrolyte water? It’s my new drug. I know it might be a full-scale placebo effect, but I’m loving every minute of it. Ever since I started drinking electrolyte water during and after my workouts, I feel far less dehydrated, meaning I have a lot more stamina.

Who cares if it’s all in my head if it makes my head say I can push my workout a little bit harder?

And finally, there’s the fish oil and probiotics (which are only grouped together because that’s how I associate them. They’re the supplements that live in the fridge.) I’m totally hooked on fish oil and probiotics.

Gentlemen – you’ll want to skip the next paragraph.

Ladies – True story: Ever since I started taking fish oil and probiotics daily, I haven’t had any PMS (and I have a long, storied history of crazy-lady PMS). After the first month of taking fish oil and probiotics daily, I actually suffered a momentary pregnancy panic. It was time for me to be getting PMS-y and I wasn’t bursting into tears for no reason even at all! I have no idea if it’s the fish oil, the probiotics, or the combination of both, but I’m a happy camper (and so is my husband!) so I’ll be sticking with this magical cocktail.

Ok, guys – it’s safe to come back now.

If you decide to try fish oil (and my herbalist insists on liquid, not capsule) I recommend finding one with peach or mango flavoring. The lemon variety is pretty gross. I find that the tropical flavors do a better job at masking the fishiness.

Do you take any supplements? If so, what kind of glorious health boosts do they give you?

With all the supplements I take every day, I expect to develop x-ray vision and super-strength any day now.

Lifestyle Change

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Go ahead - make friends.

Go ahead – make friends.

Within the community of formerly-obese fitness junkies, there is a common mantra. We tend to go around mumbling about ‘Lifestyle Change’ to anyone who will listen.

I’ve touched on this theme several times in passing, but it deserves its own discussion.

“Lifestyle Change” is code for ‘if you think you can only diet and exercise until you reach your goal, you’re going to gain it all back. The change has to stick… forever.’

We don’t want to scare you off, though. We reference “Lifestyle Change” to soften the blow.

But, what we have learned is this: No one who keeps significant weight off is ever able to return to their comfy-cozy, curled-up-all-day-eating-their-favorite-foods lives.

Know those Biggest Loser contestants who go back home and gain it all back? They didn’t get the memo on Lifestyle Change. They thought a quick fix was possible. I can’t blame them – I yo-yoed for years because I avoided the Lifestyle Change. Lifestyle Change felt way beyond me.

When I got started, I couldn’t even think about tackling forever. When I got started EVERYTHING felt hard, painful, and deserving of my constant animosity. The thought of enduring such torture for the rest of my days was WAY more than I was prepared for.

I didn’t want to be heavy anymore, and I knew something had to change. Beyond that, I couldn’t even process.

I was ready to consider a few months – maybe even a year – of hard work, but I didn’t think I had anything more than that in me. I certainly didn’t think I’d ever actually embrace the hard work that is fitness.

I still wanted to believe the infomercials. CHANGE YOUR LIFE IN 60 DAYS!!

If you’re where I was when I was thinking about getting started, if yo-yo dieting feels normal to you – then you’re the person I am talking to when I hint about the importance of a ‘lifestyle change’.

I don’t want to feed you propaganda about how quick and easy shedding obesity and adopting fitness can be. But I don’t want you to fear that such a change could mean biting off more than you can chew.

The benefits of Healthy & Strong far outweigh the comforts of sloth (oh, I do adore sloth… it’s easily my favorite deadly sin), but you need to feel them for yourself.

None of my sporty friends were ever able to convince me that I’d be happier if I got fit. I hated dieting, and I hated exercise. How could working things that I hate into my daily life POSSIBLY make me happier? Nonsense.

But, of course, they were right.

These days, if I wake up on the wrong side of the bed and the children have me wanting to tear my hair out before 8am, I know there’s a light at the end of the tunnel. As much as I would never have believed it one short year ago, the light at the end of the tunnel lies on the other side of a good workout.

I know that if I work an hour of sweating into my day, I’ll be as right as rain on the other side.

I still find fitness to be hard work, but now I know that it’s worth every struggling minute. It’s worth the full-scale lifestyle change, because this lifestyle is happier, more confident, less stressed-the-eff-out.

Healthy & Strong had to become integral parts of my identity.

So, go ahead. Don’t be afraid. Change your whole identity.

It’s the stuff of superheroes.

The One Ton Panel

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If you read about my participation in #140You and felt simply shattered that you couldn’t be there, never fear! The video of our panel discussion is up!

You have no idea how relieved I was when I saw this for the first time this morning. I have an unfortunate tendency to go all high-pitched when speaking publicly. I am positively bursting with pride that I managed to keep the screechiness to a minimum.

Hopefully we serve as a reminder that when you’re ready to commit to your journey, nothing can stop you! You’re never too old, too big, too inexperienced, or too damaged to grab control. This life is what you make it – so make it healthy!

Perception

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fun house mirror Katey

I’ve been thinking about perception a lot lately.

How do you see yourself? How does that vision compare with how others see you? Is it important that these two perceptions match?

Should we care? Or – to be a bit more honest – Why do we care so much??

If you spend much time on social media, you’ve probably seen this video going around:

Dustin Hoffman rocks my socks. I’m so grateful to him for reminding me of the disconnect between our perceptions and the truthful understanding of ourselves and one another.

Around the time this video went viral, I had a wonderful, motivating conversation with a new friend from #140You, Liz Nead of Nead Inspiration (http://neadinspiration.com/). Liz mentioned the importance of recognizing the chasm between the way that we view ourselves and the way that the rest of the world sees us.

This conversation reminded me of a night in 2010 (read: Katey at Peak Weight). My husband and I were watching a reality show about morbid obesity. The episode featured a 400 pound woman. She was a truck driver, and her size made it hard for her to get into and out of the cab of her truck.

When I looked at her, I saw myself.

I weighed 150 lbs less than her, but that’s not what I saw. In my mind’s eye I saw myself at max capacity, and I assumed that everyone else saw me that way, too. I was astonished when my husband’s response was “WHAT? You’re nowhere near that!”

I just assumed that he (and everyone else, for that matter) saw me the same way I saw myself.

That moment was a jarring one. It was the first time I realized that there might be a significant disconnect between my self perception and the way the rest of the world sees me.

Over the weekend, I had a similarly jarring moment.

My sister-in-law gave me a t-shirt for my birthday (it’s later this week – don’t forget to shop early and often!) and pointed out it’s size: XS. I told her I’ve been feeling perplexed by clothing sizes lately.

I’m wearing a S/XS in tops these days (RIP, Once XL Bosoms)… so, what do actually extra-small girls wear? What does my sister-in-law wear? She’s tiny – petite and skinny. She didn’t even get heavy during pregnancy! So – what does she wear? Does she have to shop in the kids’ section?

She looked at me like I’d grown another head. She says she wears the same size as me. She says we’re the same size.

I cannot wrap my head around that, but it seemed like an obvious fact to her.

The parallels between these instances has me wondering: Is the disconnect between my self-perception and the way others see me something that I should work on? Or, is it just something that I should accept as a natural part of all of our lives?

Dustin Hoffman speaks of the cultural brainwashing that causes us to overlook people who we don’t perceive as beautiful. Can we re-wire our brains to see other people (and ourselves!) clearly?

I imagine that if I had the ability to hear other people’s thoughts (think Mel Gibson in What Women Want) I’d get a clear vision of what everyone else sees. I could then change in a way that would make me more appealing to the public at large.

But is this a good idea?

Would we love ourselves more if we knew that everyone perceived us in a positive light?

Should we change ourselves if we elicit a negative public perception?

My strong, independent, modern woman side screams NO! I am enough, and if you can’t see that, that’s your problem. But my people-pleaser side begs me to bend over backwards to appeal to as many people as possible.

If I am healthy and strong, should I care about your projections when you look at me? Why does understanding how you see me feel important? And, if I can never clearly see what you see, what good does it do to manipulate myself in some imagined direction?

Do you have any perception-disconnect stories? If so, please share in the comments section! Maybe we can work through these things together. I want to see you for who you are. I want to be seen in my true form (flaws and all), and to feel confident in – even proud of! – what I project in this hyper-connected world of ours.

Perhaps there is Truth to be found at the place where our diverse perceptions meet.

Lessons Learned

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In my post ‘A Necessary Detox’ I announced that I was not going to weigh myself for a month. I hoped a detox would help me to crowbar my emotional state away from the numbers on the scale.

Today was weigh-in day.

When I woke up, the scale was the first thing on my mind. My heart was pounding before my feet hit the floor. I mean pounding.

Successful detox? Not so much.

This morning, I discovered that I lost four pounds. That’s fine. It means I lost the two that I put on (precipitating the detox) and shed two more. I’m still in the 5 pound range (140-145) that I aim to maintain.

Staying off of the scale didn’t cause the dreaded yo-yo.

But, I have to admit that the experiment was a complete failure.

I thought that staying away from the scale would make me care about it less. Instead, I developed a full-blown fear-driven obsession. I was so afraid that I would return to the scale and find a true yo-yo (gaining 10+ pounds) that I became punishingly strict with myself all month long as I attempted to silence the fear.

When I’m especially strict, I’m not gentle with myself. My thought processes went something like this: “How many blueberries did I just eat? I bet it was more than 1/4 cup! That’s more than I budgeted myself for the afternoon! Stupid!! I’m going to pay for that on weigh-in day for sure! I better get back to the gym even though I’m not feeling well.”

Wait… wasn’t I supposed to be ‘detoxing’ in an effort to stop beating up on myself?

This morning, when I saw that there had been no significant change, I felt certifiably ridiculous. I have been driving myself to distraction for no reason.

Attention to metrics feels like having a good grip on the status of my health. Avoiding the metrics led to fear rather than the sought-after empowerment.

So, I’m going to go the other way and see if it’s any better for my mental health. I’m going to weigh myself if I have the impulse to do so. If I need a little reassurance that I’m not going off track, I’ll weigh in. But, there will be no set weigh-in time. No more Mandatory Mondays.

Maybe over time I’ll shed the fear.

For now, I need to acknowledge that I live with a daily fear of losing what I have worked so hard for. I think maybe I need to be ok with that, and give myself time. I’ve kept 100 pounds off for about 7 months. Hopefully, when I’ve kept it off for 7 years, it will be so second nature, I won’t need to think about it.

Until then, I’ll settle for the wisdom of trials and errors.

Happy Inspiration

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I saw two videos at #140You that made me smile and inspired me to keep up the hard work.

Obviously, this meant I had to share.

Hope you enjoy them as much as I did!

No excuses, y’all! Get it in where you can fit it in!

Gosh, I hope that if I keep ‘fitting it in’ I’ll get as strong and fierce as Andia Winslow. I kind of want to be her when I grow up.

(Pay no attention to the fact that I’m quite sure she’s younger than I am. Details, details.)

Don’t wait until tomorrow. You can turn it all around right. this. minute. Do it up!

The only things holding you back are your excuses.

Sidebar/Update: 2 more days until the 1-month weigh-in. I am shaking in my boots. Wish me luck on Wednesday!

Stranger In A Strange Land

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Marilyn

I have a confession to make.

You know that part of the gym where they keep the weights? Where all those grunting men are pumping iron?

I think of it as The Boy Zone, and it intimidates the hell out of me.

You see, I have spent a lifetime gleefully cultivating my girly-girl femininity. I grew up emulating Marilyn Monroe, Rita Hayworth, and Brigitte Bardot. Today, I buy anything with Princess Kate on the cover. You get the idea.

I don’t know about your gym, but when you walk into mine, the gender division is pretty blatant. Almost all of the women are on cardio machines, while the weight training areas are Testosterone Central.

So, as a newcomer to the gym world, I kept myself in my girly lane. I only used the gym for cardio. I worked with weights when I got home and no one was watching.

It’s ridiculous, but I had myself convinced that being seen lifting weights would somehow diminish my femininity.

My silly little gender role snow globe was due for a good shake.

First, I actively considered venturing into Testosterone Central. When I did, I heard a small inner voice saying ‘that’s not for you – it’s not for girls.’

As soon as I heard that voice, my bigger, stronger, Mama Tiger voice kicked in and whooped that little voice’s ass.

Here’s why: TRY to tell my daughter that she can’t or shouldn’t do something because she’s a girl and the thing she wants to try is just for boys. Go ahead and try. I will rain down protective maternal fury that will scorch the earth, I swear.

My daughter can reach for any stars in the sky and nobody better come at her with any toxic cultural BS.

So why don’t I apply that same mentality to myself?? How can I model equality if I don’t walk the walk?

Come on, Mama Tiger – go lift weights!

Um… ok… yeah, that’s totally legit. I’ll get right on that. Just, um… not today. Today’s… busy… and stuff. I’ll be Power Woman tomorrow.

Tomorrow came, and it brought the final push that I needed.

I was back at the gym, back on my cardio machine, when a woman I know walked in. Our kids go to nursery school together. She lives in my ‘intimidatingly pretty’ mental category. There is no deficit of femininity in this woman.

Did she take a sharp right and jump on a cardio machine like a good girl? Hell no. This chick marched her ass right over to the Boy Zone and grabbed some metal. She did pull-ups! She worked with a barbell! I was floored.

I know I’m a terrible feminist for even admitting these things, but seeing a woman whose image was already set in my mind as a ‘pretty girl’ in that part of the gym was something I needed.

When I told her I was inspired, she said she just doesn’t care what anyone else thinks. She’s there to get strong, so that’s what she’s going to do.

Badass! I love it! I want to be like that!

So, last week I marched my ultra-femme behind right into the middle of it all. I did squat presses. I did deadlifts with hammer curls. I sweated and I pushed, and I got a damn good workout.

I exercised my body and I expanded my comfort zone. I killed another ‘can’t’, and it feels b-a-n-a-n-a-s.

Up next: Learning to deal with the gawking of pubescent boys. Can’t say I’m a fan of the attention that I attract as the woman doing squats in boy land.

Sidebar/Update: 3 weeks off of the scale! Not weighing myself seems to be kicking my workouts up to the next level. I am combining cardio and weight training every day. It’s driven by a fear of the unknown, but I’ll take it!

Expanding My Definition of Fitness

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#140You

Last week I had the distinct honor of being included in the #140You conference in NYC.

*Pause for applause and various throwing of floral gifts*

A few months ago, I got a call from my mother. She told me that a conference on Health, Wellness, Fitness & Food was being organized. She encouraged me to get involved.

My first reaction was the familiar pull-back I feel whenever I’m intimidated.

Then she told me about the host.

His name is Jeff Pulver. Jeff is probably best known as the co-founder of Vonage. His professional resume will make your head spin. But that’s not what caught my attention.

What grabbed me was this: Jeff and I have been strangers on parallel paths. We both went too many decades without minding our fitness. Then, within months of each other, we both reached a tipping point and found the motivation to turn it all around. We both had to start our fitness journeys slowly, because slowly was all we could manage. We both set lofty goals. We both knew it would be hard work, and we did it anyway. No gimmicks. No surgery. Just discipline, sweat and time.

I had never met the man, but I was sure I had discovered my fitness soul-brother.

I submitted my story and this blog, and was invited to attend.

So, despite shaking like a leaf (on the inside, at least) I left the kids with my baby daddy and stepped out into a whole new adventure.

Not only did I find a community of positive and inspiring individuals, I gained a whole new understanding of the meaning of fitness.

My new friends addressed everything from paying attention to where our agriculture comes from to self-esteem and meditation. We talked yoga, gluten-free eating, body image, the importance of cooking your own food, and so much more.

I will be writing about these themes at length in the weeks to come, but first I had to share my greatest revelation: Just because I finally got fit doesn’t mean there isn’t plenty of room for improvement.

There is a whole lot going on in the ‘wellness’ department that I have not even begun to consider.

When I was obese, I blamed my weight for everything from my lack of self-esteem to my joint pain and everything in between.

Losing weight and gaining strength improved lots of things in lots of ways. But it wasn’t a cure-all.

I still battle my demons every day. I still struggle with self-esteem. I still worry about my health.

My husband offered an amazing insight. He related my experience to alcoholism. (Whaaaaa??? I know. Hear me out.)

When an alcoholic quits drinking, a lot of things improve in a lot of ways. The body is stronger and healthier, the mind is clearer, life gets perceptibly better.

But quitting drinking can’t take away the reasons why you were drinking in the first place. It doesn’t mean you’ll never fall off the wagon. It’s a life-long process that requires daily tending. Sobriety (like a healthy and fit lifestyle) should not be taken for granted.

#140You delivered a powerful reminder that all that is required for positive change is our own will to do what it takes to achieve it. Even if it doesn’t come naturally. Even if it hurts.

Fitness tangibly improved my daily life. But I am not at my end goal. I don’t even know what an end goal would look like! What if I am capable of levels of physical and spiritual wellness that I always assumed were somehow impossible for ‘someone like me’? After all, less than 2 years ago I had never even considered the possibility that I could be a physically strong woman.

What if I apply as much positive energy to adopting new wellness practices as I did to losing 100 lbs? What if those new practices made as much of a difference as discovering my stronger, more confident self?

I confess – I’m feeling a bit giddy about the possibility of once-unimagined improvements manifesting in my life.

To this end, there is currently in my kitchen: Fish oil, probiotics, a whooooole lot of vitamins and herbs, avocados, almonds, blueberries, grapefruit, edamame, chia seeds and green tea.

Fish Oil?

Will my body thank me if I hold my nose and choke down fish oil?

Keep pushing your boundaries, friends. Who knows how far we can go!

Sidebar/Update: I have gone 2 weeks without stepping on the scale! I’m hanging in there, but I worry about it more than I want to. I’m doing a bit more cardio than usual, because without confirmation that I’m maintaining, I become convinced that I’m gaining. Stupid, toxic scale mentality! Hoping I’ll shake it as time rolls on.

A Necessary Detox

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Nemesis

Hi. My name is Katey and I’m an addict.

I’m addicted to my scale.

I know precisely how much I have weighed at every stage of my life, and how I judged my own value as a result.

How can I possibly know how to feel about myself if I don’t know how much I weigh?

This week, I did not do a good job of protecting my sense of self-worth. You see, I committed a grievous sin: I gained two pounds while on a brief family vacation.

Commence well-worn self-flagellation sequence.

Gaining 2 lbs ruined my whole Monday (Monday is always weigh-in day). “I know better! What do I expect when I let myself off the hook and eat BLTs and pizza while sipping cocktails?? Shame on me! Bad, bad Katey!”

I hope you think that such a reaction to 2 lbs is neurotic and that I’m being too hard on myself. It took me a couple of days, but that’s what I finally realized.

My clothes fit the same way. I’m as strong as I was before I stepped on the scale on Monday morning. You wouldn’t know that I gained any weight just by looking at me. In fact, this picture that I posted to my “About” page was taken on the vacation in question – about 36 hours before discovering the minor gain.

Live a life worth telling a story about :-)

So, why did those two little pounds (that I know I can take off again) have the power to bring me down?? Does the girl in my “About” picture look like someone who should be beaten up for weight-related failure? Does that body deserve my shame? No. I need to put my foot down. That body is just fine, thank you. (Yes, I am talking to my own inner voice. Don’t judge me.)

I tell everyone who asks for my advice on fitness not to get too hung up on the scale. The hardest weeks in my 100 pound journey were the weeks when the scale wouldn’t budge. I’d be doing my best, working out, not cheating, and still that stupid scale would stay stubbornly stuck on the same number.

Those were the weeks that I considered quitting. “I just can’t do it! It’s too hard!”

When trying to lose weight, I weigh myself once a week. I get excited for Monday mornings. I can’t wait to see those numbers fall. This makes the emotional crash all the more painful when there is no loss. And, since entering ‘maintenance phase’, I’ve been weighing myself more than ever – almost daily. I want to be sure I’m maintaining. I want to catch any gains and turn them around as quickly as they appear.

But now, I think it’s time that I take my own advice. I need to stop worrying about the stupid numbers on the scale.

I need a detox.

So – here’s what I’m going to do: I’m going to detox from the scale for a full month in an attempt to put a little distance between the scale and my emotional state. I’ll stick to my calorie-monitored diet and continue to exercise 6 days a week. I’ll monitor my weight with my clothes. If they start to feel snug, I’ll tighten things up for a while on the caloric side until my jeans fit well again.

I may need to ask my husband to hide the scale so I can’t cheat.

Just writing this has raised my heart rate.

Instant panic-sensation? Yeah. A detox is in order.

I’ll let you know if I break out in hives.

Chemistry

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Breaking Up With Tracy

Dear Ms. Anderson,

May I call you Tracy?

No?

Oh. Um… ok.

Sorry.

When I shelled out $100+ to order your Metamorphosis program, I was filled with vim and vigor. Your client list made my head spin. You train Gwyneth? And J.Lo? And Shakira? And Gisele?! OMG – you can show me how to work out like them?! That’s awesome! I’m so there! Let’s get started!!

The first 30 minutes of every workout is spent doing the same ‘dance’ routine? Which is mostly just constant bouncing? That’s… new. But, you’re the expert! Screamingly sore calves be damned! If Gwyneth can do it, I can do it!

The second half – the part that changes every ten days… that’s pretty… unique. I mean, clearly you’re applying a dance background, which is fine, but I feel a little silly flapping my arms like a demented bird of prey. No matter. I also felt silly doing power jumps, and by the end of Insanity I wanted to kiss Shaun T full on the mouth. So, flapping it is.

I have to admit, the ‘strategic muscle fatigue’ is a beast. Working the same muscle over and over and OVER again? Whoa. That’s intense. Sorry about the cursing. I’m sure Gwyneth doesn’t curse.

I marched dutifully to the pink and white calendar and checked off each successfully completed workout, one by one.

But I have to admit – it didn’t take long for me to begin to dread my daily workout. Midway through the second 10-day block I had to really psych myself up to push play.

This might sound odd, but I need to have good chemistry with my remote trainers.

Despite Insanity being drop-dead difficult, I kicked my own ass all the way through every single prescribed workout because I was so inspired and encouraged by Shaun T. His enthusiasm, energy and encouragement as he yelled at me to DIG DEEPER! kept me going. At the beginning of each workout, Shaun T’s voice yells “Come on, y’all! Let’s GO!!” I developed a fully Pavlovian response. I’d hear my encouragement to get started, and I would get an surge of ‘here we go!’ energy. He may not know it, but Shaun T and I have amazing chemistry.

Then there’s my girl, Jillian Anderson. She’s one tough chick, but she inspires me. She explains why she’s making you do painful things, which somehow makes the painful things a bit easier to take. She acknowledges that her workouts are hard, that ‘tough’ is who she is. But, she tells you that you can do it, and explains how it really will make you stronger. I might not think we’d ever be besties, but Jillian and I have good chemistry, too.

Your workouts are tough, but they’re a lot less physically intimidating than Insanity and no more intimidating than my favorite Jillian Michaels video (Shout-out to No More Trouble Zones! It rocks my socks). Yet I pulled back from your Method harder than I ever pulled back from Shaun T or Jillian.

I was hoping to be inspired by you, Ms. Anderson. Instead, the lack of inspiration is dragging me down in a big way.

I have to confess – I began referring to you among friends as ‘The FemBot’.

I’m sorry. I don’t mean to be hurtful. I’m sure you’re a wonderful friend, wife and mother. It’s just that in your professional capacity you remind me of all the intimidating mean girls from high school and college, the ones who just couldn’t understand why anyone would ever struggle with the things that came easily to them. Wanting to look like you and your clients isn’t enough motivation to get me through 90 days of feeling like my remote trainer is disappointed in me. I mean, let’s face it. Warmth and encouragement aren’t exactly your strong suits.

Your ‘do it because I say so’ approach turned me all the way off. Also, no verbal cues to go from one exercise to the next? Pass. When I’m working hard, I will probably look away from the tv to focus. I could use a reminder when it’s time to switch.

Do you know how psychotic it feels when you don’t want to do your workout because it feels like your trainer is being mean? And that trainer has never even seen your face? It’s one step from a padded room.

The nail in the coffin of Happy Exhaustion’s adventure with the Tracy Anderson Method came from the man who never steers me wrong. As I bounced and cursed, the resident fitness trainer just shook his head. “Whenever you want to give this ish up, I’ll support that” he said.

“But it must be working!” I protested. “It hurts like HELL!”

“Yes,” he said “but I can fatigue your finger until it hurts like hell, too. Just bend and flex it a few hundred times and it’ll be screaming. That doesn’t mean it’s a good workout.”

I’m sorry, Ms. Anderson. In the name of my (entirely vital) enthusiasm for my personal fitness, I have to break up with you. I’m sorry. It’s not your fault.

There’s just no chemistry.

– Katey

PS: Now accepting recommendations for the next fitness adventure!